Anthony's Wandering Weiner

How am I only now hearing about a sex scandal involving someone named Anthony Weiner?

Sun, sun, go away, come again some other day

I never wanted to live in Southern California. The idea of day after day after day after day of sun isn't appealing. In fact, it's creepy—like the dolls your grandmother had that looked like they could be extras in Bride of Chucky. Instead of those dolls' glacial blue eyes though, we're caught in the glare of a solar cyclops that is drying up wells, fissuring the land, and causing trees to weep shrivelled leaves.